Sick

Being that I am a first time mom, and the mom of a special needs kid, I have no experience with having a "normal" child getting sick. I wonder if regular moms worry and freak out as much as us special needs moms. Every time Thomas gets sick I wonder if there is more at play than just a virus or a bug. Is it something deeper and more sinister? Is that cough and fever just a precursor to something scarier?

I am always worried that some day he will eventually end up having seizures. Many CP kids end up having seizures but we have been lucky with that so far. But the thought is always there, in the back of my mind, lurking in the darkness with all those other scary thoughts that come with being the mom of a special needs child.

Tonight Thomas is sick. He has been vomiting throughout the day since coming home from school. He hasn't eaten anything but has drank two cups of juice. He fell asleep around 5 only to wake up three times to vomit. He is miserable. He looks so sad, pale, and small. I don't like it. It scares me. He had this same thing happen a few weekends ago, it lasted for just two evenings (he was fine during the day) and then went away. I'm hoping that is the case this time. But now I wonder what is behind this? Why is he throwing up? He has a low-grade fever, nothing serious. No coughing, no runny nose, no other symptoms.

So why am I so worried? Why does this little nugget of fear embed itself in my brain? Do regular moms go through this? Or for them is a cold just a cold, throwing up just a stomach bug, a fever just a fever?